Welcome to my first ranty post and I apologise in advance if I sound a bit angry, but these sorts of topics get me very riled up.
If a guy came up to you on the street and smacked your arse or grabbed your hips, it would be sexual harassment and assault, right? So why, WHY in the name of whatever God you believe in do guys think it’s okay to do it in clubs or bars? You wouldn’t dream of doing it in daylight where everyone can see you (well, maybe you would, in which case you’re the worst kind of person and don’t deserve the air you breathe), so why do you think it’s acceptable to do it on a dancefloor? And before you hype up and say “she was gagging for it dancing like a slag and wearing a short skirt”, SO WHAT. I’ve been in a long-term relationship that I intend on staying in for the rest of my life, and I like to show a bit of leg or cleavage and dance like Beyonce’s alter ego after a few drinks. I do it for me, because it makes ME feel good. It is not for you and it does not mean that I want to be groped or smacked, it means I’m having a good time. I can tell you now, no girl wants to be molested by a stranger when they’re out with their friends. None at all. It’s not flattering, it’s not comfortable and it’s not legal. If you want a girls attention, pay her a polite verbal compliment or just give her a little smile.
I remember a few years ago now, I was out with a friend in a club dancing the night away. There was a smoke machine that kept going off every now and then, so you couldn’t see anything for about 5 seconds. During one of those 5 second blasts, some fuckwit decided to grab on of my breasts so hard that it felt like it had been pulled off. Because of the smoke, I couldn’t see who did it, and they did it so quickly I didn’t get the chance to grab their arm and break it either. I felt mortified and violated. I felt like a piece of meat. From that point on, my night was ruined. I kept looking around cautiously in case it happened again, and kept covering myself with my arms in a poor attempt to protect myself. I felt that inhumane prick’s grasps around my chest until I woke up the next morning. It was a hideous experience, and took me until very recently to realise that what happened was actually illegal.
It makes me sick to my stomach, and I pray that if it happens to anyone reading this, or anyone at all for that matter, they have the courage and the chance to slap the bastard that does it and report it. It’s not just what happens when you go out. It’s not okay because its dark. It’s not okay because you’re dancing like you belong in one of Rhianna’s music videos. It’s not okay because you’re wearing a tight dress. It is never okay. If you’re unsure for any reason, search “sexual assault definition” and the government website will clear it up for you.
Stand up for yourselves ladies! You are too beautiful to let a sleazy man ruin your night, like they did mine. It sure as hell wouldn’t happen now!